I've been "making" music since I was 14 (ten years ago now), and in that time I've met many people who internally devalue their own artistic abilities. This can range from many causes and reasons, whether that be falling short of their expectation of where their skill should be or some external fault crushing their self-esteem. Music can be challenging to create. Some people (and I mean most people) don't truly understand what goes into making even a single song. The production of any track requires the basic, raw foundation of recording instrumentation and vocals, structuring those recorded elements into a cohesive composition, and then properly mixing/mastering the entire cut into something sonically digestible.With personal goals and expectations, often younger artists (or any age, really) don't initially comprehend how simply difficult performing/producing music can be nor the time sink required to master any skill. Latent talents that a few people have regarding the arts sometimes are never brought to their potential due to either the fear of not being good enough before they even start, or having grossly high expectations going in, only to realize they can't rap the entirety of Travis Scott's "Antidote" on tempo on their first try, and then giving up. You'll have to re-record, re-mix and re-compose, and then re-re-re-mix a track several times before it's releasable.
For new artists, looking up to their favorite artists, they can become intimidated by how quickly those artists can churn out quality material compared to how long it may take for they themselves to produce one decent track. These things take time and practice, not everyone is Lil Wayne or Juice WRLD. If you're truly passionate about the craft, you have to practice, slowly improving yourself and learning to smile through your failures while using them as lessons on how to be better.
This can be disheartening.
Messing up hundreds of times a day on the piano trying to learn your favorite pop song can feel like a chore. I know many people who abandoned some art form because they assumed they'd be Beethoven upon touching an (plastic) ivory key for the first time.
External forces can be numerous. Maybe somebody lives in a misunderstanding household, their family members teasing and mocking them for recording vocals in their room. Or, they have an extremely toxic individual living with them who antagonizes them constantly. For me, I had been living in an abusive household after abusive household, being disrespected daily for any art I'd create. If you are in a situation similar to that, and that can be just having dismissive parents or cruel siblings, work to remove yourself from that situation. People can’t, and won’t change; don’t waste your time trying to fix them and take yourself away from the toxicity. You’ll be amazed by how immediate you confidence will grow without someone actively tearing it down.
Another more relatable issue is marketing. You might've created the hardest rage/digicore trunk knocker of the last 40 years, but if you don't have a solid fanbase and you don't have a large Instagram following, who's gonna listen? Seeing only 2-10 plays in SoundCloud or YouTube can be soul crushing at times. You want to be heard, but no one is listening.
It's surprising how common these outside elements come into play regarding someone's opinions on their life trajectory.
I've known some people who never practiced (or didn't do enough), coming into the studio just expecting me to sniff their ass while they spit the wackest bars you'd ever heard. Don't do this. Sure, have confidence, but also have the ability to back it up. There's plenty of people who haven't proven themselves, who believe that if somebody just gave them a chance, they'd become the biggest rapper of all time.
The person I'm referring to hasn't spoken to me in years, probably because I told them to practice more and then escalated to telling them to "we're not friends" after he claimed my beats as his own since he laid a mid, random flowing verse for two minutes over each one.
Something that (although petty to some extent) frustrates me is seeing talented, skilled artists giving up while delusional and incompetent individuals have no problem pumping out (subjective) garbage, sometimes to zero fanfare thinking they’re making the hottest shit ever.
A prime example of someone I instantly became a fan of only to be let down upon checking his SoundCloud page to see the last upload being (at the time) from early 2021, would have to be Texan-native producer Aberration, real name Harrison Lewis (this is public, don't worry). I stopped doing them recently, but a year back I'd go on "SoundCloud deep dives" and just find one artist I like and then let the site choose tracks for me. More often than not, I discover great music and even some freshly favorite artists that get tossed into my daily rotation. One of which being Aberration with his absolute banger of a collaboration with Vonie Calo (f.k.a. Ayete) off his debut 2020 album, "BIGSHOT." The production and mixing on this track blew me away the first time I heard it.
But that was it. Besides 2 okay remixes after that debut and a 7 track collab EP with Vonie Calo, it'd been roughly a year since Aberration had released anything. The next day, I decided to check his page again. Out of nowhere, a brief 3 track EP was released. It was good. Only one track had vocals, but the production still shined. I then hit him up on Instagram and asked him how he went about producing the way he did. Heading over to Discord, I learned quite a bit about him and his style. I can't spill every detail of what he told me as most of the discussion was personal, but his feelings regarding the hiatus and the potential of moving on from music I can describe.
Lewis put a year's worth of effort into his CLARITY album while working a full time job and living by himself, and he got maybe a few thousand plays across every platform after a year of release. Once the pandemic hit, he had to move back in with his parents while still working a job he hated. He agreed with me that the biggest cause was poor marketing; a few other reasons being a small following, a lack of consistently released singles to build a strong following, and then quickly following up the LP with more material. That 3 track EP, TRANSCENDENCE, was meant to be his send off. After some phone calls, he expressed that he'd return to producing music again, and work to make a second album. So far, he's dropped a few rough cuts since then, with the hopes of a sort of CLARITY2 manifesting in the future.
Another SoundCloud artist I discovered with (at the time) 10 followers, was $noCat (f.k.a. diesel) from Norway. While still going by "diesel," he put out quite a few hyperpop songs that were filled with satirically edgy lyrics and several layers of irony. What made me a fast fan was his taste in beats and the decent mixing. I actually got the opportunity to mix/master one of his songs, although he never uploaded it. After wiping all of his music from his account, and then sporadically uploaded half finished tracks (which he later deleted) for like a month, and then went dark for nearly a year. I'd assumed he gave up, but turns out, it was a brand change. Now going by "$noCat," he dropped the hyperpop angle and became a Norwegian Yeat clone. An interesting aspect of this change was the inclusion of vocals performed in Norwegian, this being an idea I'd pitched to him. Honestly, as much as I liked the hyperpop stuff he'd made, the new material slaps all the same. Still has good beat choices, and the vocals are mixed well. Though I am glad I downloaded his old catalog.
Neither one of these people talk to me anymore, sadly. But I am happy that they didn't give up their art.
I'd sunken pretty low several times across the several mediums I'd dipped my toes into. Making anything requires learning skills and that takes time, time most people can't spare. I don't know if I want to spare any, especially with that uncertain fear of rejection; putting something out there and no one even seeing you. Making you question why you put so much time into something no one but yourself cares about.
But that's just it. You create not for anyone but you. If you actually want to take this seriously, you can't just push out one mediocre, unmixed track a month for your entire life. You have to consume information, deconstruct other artists' work and learn tricks and ideas from other people until it melds together into genuinely original, great material. And, if you genuinely love what you're doing, it'll reflect back through your art.
I, at least, can hear when someone didn't really care about the song they made. Hopefully you can too.
Last edited:
